Lost In The Shuffle

The days are flying by in my world.

We just got back to school on Monday after a week long winter break which in my eyes was not a break from anything but studies.  We had swimming lessons everyday and hockey tournaments, games and practices.

It was busy but a good busy.

I hired a babysitter..YAY... for the littlest of the little people.  He did well with her and she handled the twins as well.  In my eyes she is worth a lot if she can handle the chaos.

I'm done with winter.

So done.

I have neglected my blog.  I have alot to say but am holding back.  Sometimes I receive comments on here and in the real world that have a huge impact on me.  Just like I will never understand what is happening in someone else's world, people will never understand what is happening in mine.  I say that in that nicest way possible but seriously if you have one child do not try to give me advice on how to handle four!

My husband commented how easy it was to take our second son skating while our older son was at hockey practice.  He came home and told me how ridiculously easy it was to have only one child with him.  This meant paying more attention to said child.

So we started Daddy Dates.

So far two children have had chances to go out alone with Daddy on their choice of date.

They both picked hockey games....sigh.......and my daughter was one of them.  She's 4!  I will state Daddy had no influence on her.

Everyday is busy but I am a Mother of four and a wife.  My job is to take care of these people I love. I do enjoy it but some days I feel like I get lost in the shuffle of chaos.

Lost as in no one seems to care if I'm here or not, just if their food is prepared and the clothes they want are clean.

HELLO?????

Maybe it's guilt from many years ago because I lost my Mom too soon and I took her forgranted. 

So now I am wrestling my kids to see that I am a person and not a maid.....but is that for real?  OR  should I be happy that I am the maid and use lots of love in everything I do from getting them juice to tucking them into bed.

I know the answer but sometimes selfishness is a nasty thing.