I really do not want to blame my ability to never get a job finished on the fact that I am busy with my children and our daily life but seriously....that is what it is.
I could get all the things I want to do (noticed I did not say need) done when the kids finally go to sleep at night but I'm tired..I'm only human and after 15+ hours serving my children I am ready for sleep too.
When the twins were babies I would push my way through fatigue to "get things done" and I don't mean things like I want to do now (scrapbooking, exercising, reading, movies etc.) I mean laundry, meals, housecleaning etc. But I realized when I had Gage how important it is to get my rest. I am so much nicer when I am rested ;).
I guess I really did not need to title this post with the word "procrastination" because I am not trying to stall getting the job done on purpose, I am putting it off to meet the needs of something more important.
Yes, I am important and finding time for my things that lift my spirits is a good thing BUT I also want to do what I think is my job right now and that is serving my family. I can't imagine doing anything else...it's a tough job and it makes you become more balanced in every level of your life....physically, spiritually, emotionally, mentally...I have learned things being a parent that I never would have learned otherwise.
So, right now...I will not beat myself up if I can't get back down to my office to scrapbook a page in their books. I will not think I am the worst mother in the world if I have to put a coat on my daughter full of mud splatters because I saw how much fun she was having getting that mud splashed on her. I will not feel bad when I have to apologize to my six year old for yelling at him but know that he is learning that I am only human and when we hurt someone we need to ask for forgiveness.
Nope, the stuff I love to do will be there when my children are a little bit older and I have a wee bit more free time for those things. Right now, I need to concentrate on them and their needs. I really think that I have not been doing that enough and I want it to change.
I think I solved my own problem...thanks for reading.
"Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others,
faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms. "
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