A Confession

I was hoping for a nice quiet evening. I thought after the day my children had...playing outdoors all morning in the + temps and then preschool.... would knock them out to tonight BUT of course I was wrong and they were all running wild till a few minutes ago. They did have naps after school which is why they are still up and about.

I have something to confess. I figure why not do it on the blog since I know a few "real life" people that read it. Here is my confession....

I am jealous.

Jealous about those of you that have

your husbands home and your family nights etc..

What's that like?

What is it like to have Daddy gone for only 40 hours a week? Home every weekend? Gets to see every hockey/ball game? Every dance recital. Has yearly holidays so you can plan vacations?

Really, what's it like?

I want to know because in my 11 1/2 years of marriage I have never had that. I was married to a welder who worked long hours and then worked for his Dad pretty much every weekend. Then he went to work for his Dad driving truck...let me tell you...being married to a truck driver is NOT alot of fun. Then he became part owner and the rest is history...we barely saw him.

Now I sit here, wondering what it's going to be like to have him home so much. To know he will goto work and return from work at the usual times. I am excited, scared and hoping it's all we think it will be.

I have friends who have their husbands home all the time and they get to do so many things on their own without their kids. Like grocery shop, run errands, retreats, coffee dates, take exercise classes. It has been a good two years since I had any of that and if I did it usually involved a juggle of babysitters and a "I might not get there in time" from the husband.

I had a hard time reading twitter updates tonight. Lots of family movie nights, walks with husbands etc. I want that and I know I will have that in a month or so but it feels like forever since my husband and I were alone somewhere.

I just wanted to confess my jealously of those that have....I guess what I want...what I yearn for...why we are doing what were doing right now so we can have that...the togetherness that we crave. It's kind of cool that this is just all about being together. I guess it comes down to love doesn't it?