The Season Of Lent

It's Ash Wednesday today.

Which means it's the season of Lent.

Last year I gave up spending.

Unnecessary spending that is.

Like the kind of spending when you goto Wal Mart and do not really need anything but you buy it anyway. The purpose behind it was to teach myself that I do not need material things. It was to teach me that I only need one thing and we all know what that is.

It worked and I think God put it in my head because of our situation now. Only He knew where our lives would be a year later and the career change has left the bank account a little dry these days but there is no stress because I know it is not a big deal. We just do without.

The year before I gave up gossiping. I'll admit that was hard and I can't say I passed on it but that is not the purpose of Lent...the purpose is to become more like Jesus right? Is this not the time of year we are supposed to come back to Him and regroup, find our way again, reaffirm our commitment?

With each new season I give something up in return for His love, so this year I think I am giving something up that will put me in deeper in my journey of faith. I know it's what has been going on within me for many many months and it's so hard, so very hard to be obedient sometimes.

I am choosing for the next 40 days to be less selfish. I am choosing to give more of myself to my husband and family. I say "choose" because is it not human nature to be selfish? Everyday I will have to make even more choices to not consider myself first.

I already do this as a mother of four and a wife but I want to give more. I want it to become an instant thing that I choose other's over myself all the time.

Don't get me wrong, I am not going to deplete my health or sanity but I think you all know what I mean by this. I want to really concentrate on the "selfish" part of me during lent and see what develops within.